Don’t call a life happy before it is complete
Introduction
Is happiness a momentary thing—or does it only show up in retrospect? Imagine a person at the height of their success: prosperity, admiration, a seemingly perfect life. But what if years later, betrayal, misfortune, or regret overshadow this glamorous existence? Were they ever truly happy?
The old saying ‘ante obitum nemo beatus’ (‘No man is happy before his death.’) comes from Solon, a Greek statesman. Solon thus attributed happiness to Croesus, but not perfect happiness, and explained that one could only call a person perfectly happy when his whole life had been lived, that is, when he had died. Croesus (c. 590–541 BC), the last king of Lydia in Asia Minor, was known above all for his wealth and generosity. Because of his riches, Croesus believed himself to be the happiest man on earth. Unexpectedly, however, Solon told the disappointed king that he believed that an unknown Athenian private citizen was the happiest person because he lived in a prosperous state, had had capable sons who outlived him, and he himself, after deciding the victory of the Athenians over their opponents, had fallen and been honourably buried by his fellow citizens. Solon challenges us to rethink our understanding of happiness, success and fulfilment.
This post is about:
- What does this phrase really mean?
- Why do we often judge happiness too soon?
- How does resistance shape a fulfilled life?
- What is needed to leave a legacy of true contentment?
Let’s not look at happiness as a fleeting moment, but as the result of a life well lived.
What does ‘ante obitum nemo beatus’ mean?
In essence, this wisdom says that happiness cannot be measured in a single moment, but only reveals itself in the totality of a lifetime. No one can be sure whether they are truly happy while their destiny is still being fulfilled.
The Greek philosopher Solon addressed these words to King Croesus, warning him not to rely on his wealth as a sign of true happiness. Only when all the possibilities and twists of life have been exhausted can true happiness be judged.
Why is this important? Because we live in a world of quick judgements. We confuse short-term successes with lasting satisfaction and see defeats as final failures. When we see happiness as a lifelong journey, we make better decisions and develop more resilience.
Why true happiness only shows up in retrospect
The illusion of instant happiness
In our modern world, instant gratification is what counts most – likes, recognition, material success. But does a short-term high really mean long-term satisfaction?
- Social media shows a deceptive version of happiness: we see self-portrayals, not reality and the challenges behind them.
- Short-term success can be misleading: a promotion or winning the lottery can bring happiness, but what if it is followed by stress or emptiness?
- Emotional highs are fleeting: the rush of happiness passes – and those who only strive for it will constantly experience disappointment.
Why this is important: true happiness does not come from fleeting moments, but from deep, long-term fulfilment.
How challenges contribute to a fulfilled life
Resistance and setbacks shape our personality. Difficulties bring clarity and give life meaning.
- Overcoming challenges makes us stronger: Those who overcome challenges develop inner strength and emotional stability.
- Setbacks bring insights: Crises force us to question our priorities and recognise what is important.
- Suffering gives our perspective a different depth: Many of history’s most influential figures – from Nelson Mandela to Frida Kahlo – found their true purpose in adversity.
Why this is important: A fulfilled life is not one without pain, but one that grows through challenge.
The danger of hasty judgements
We tend to be quick to assess happiness – our own and that of others.
- Appearances can be deceiving: Many people who appear successful on the outside are unhappy on the inside.
- Life is unpredictable: a setback can be a new beginning, and an apparent wave of success can lead to disaster.
- Only the whole life story counts: no one knows whether a person was really happy until their life is over.
Why this is important: those who are patient with their own path and do not judge others hastily develop more empathy and inner peace.
A long-term view of happiness
The true meaning of a life often only becomes apparent later. Many events that were perceived as negative turn out to be necessary turning points in retrospect.
- A lost job can lead to a true calling.
- A failed relationship can make room for true love.
- A detour can turn out to be the actual way.
Why this is important: It takes time and experience for us to recognise the true value of our experiences.
Conclusion: Happiness is a journey
The wisdom of Solon teaches us patience and a profound understanding of contentment.
- Don’t judge your luck too soon. Short-term success or failure means nothing for the big picture.
- Resistance is what makes us who we are. Challenges are often life’s true teachers.
- A fulfilled life leaves its mark. Happiness is more than a feeling – it is the legacy we leave behind.
What does ‘ante obitum nemo beatus’ mean to you? Perhaps true happiness is not what you experience right now, but what you recognise at the end of your life.